It’s Incredible to Think How Much Life Changes As You Grow Older

lobster.jpg

As the years pass, it’s funny to look back at how much we’ve changed in how we look at the world. For instance, when I was 5 years old my greatest fear was that a giant lobster was going to attack and eat me.

Now?

My greatest fear is that a I’m going to show up for an interview for a job I really want, only to get beat out by a candidate much more prepared, polished, and qualified than me.

And what is that candidate?

You guessed it…a giant lobster.

Wearing a suit and carrying a briefcase. Flashing a smug grin at me as he pats me on the shoulder condescendingly with claw on his way out of the office. Or at least I think it’s a grin. Lobsters don’t really have faces so it’s hard to tell.

The boss exits the interview room, patting sweat from his brow. “My word,” he remarks to me, as the Charming Lobster effortlessly flirts with the receptionist. “That was the single best job interview I’ve ever witnessed. It was so good, I’m calling any and all of your future employers and telling them not to hire you.”

The main takeway from this is that it’s stupid to think a giant lobster would try to eat you.

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