Had a back and forth with my brother Greg (the birthday boy today) and my buddies Marques and Daniel yesterday. We like to debate “one seeds” for different things over group text. (Think NCAA Tournament). Yesterday we were debating our one seed for movies that always “get” to us. Here’s what I came up with for my top five (and they aren’t the typical tear jerkers):
Rocky: Down! Down! Stay Down!
When Rocky gets knocked down, Mickey tells him to stay down but he gets up anyway. Then we cut to Apollo looking like “Is this guy fucking serious?” I’ve even incorporated Rocky’s “bring it on” beckoning motion into my act when dealing with crowds I’m bombing in front of.
Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade: Don’t Be Stupid Like the Nazi Chick
Indy’s reaching for the Holy Grail. He already watchd the Nazi chick fall to her doom. He reaches and reaches for it, before his Pops, Sean Connery, says, “Indiana…let it go.” It always got me because it was the first time he referred to him as Indiana. They called the dog Indiana!
Scrooged: God Bless Us, Everyone.
One of the last lines of the movie: Frank Cross’s assistant’s son, rendered silent after watching his father’s murder, utters this phrase like Tiny Tim did. (1:59 mark of the clip) I have nothing sarcastic to say about this. Watch this movie and this scene and if you don’t at least start to tear up, you have no soul.
Return of the Jedi: Why Was There A Giant Empty Elevator Shaft in the Death Star Anyway?
Realizing his kid is about to get killed by some old man who just told his kid to kill him, Darth Vader chucks the Emperor down a conveniently placed elevator shaft (was it for an elevator? What was it for?) The part that always gets me here is Vader looking back and forth between the Luke and the Emperor, like the way a dog looks at you weird when you mess with its dish.
The Dark Knight Rises: Alfred’s Final Fernet Branca
In The Dark Knight Rises when Alfred nods to Bruce at that cafe. It’s an implausible scene – as Kevin Smith once said, did Bruce just go around from Italian cafe to Italian cafe looking for Alfred? – but I don’t care.
If you sign up for my email list, you’ll be moved to tears of joy on a monthly basis. And I may even buy you a Fernet Branca.