“Thx” is the Worst Abbreviation

There’s a lot of proper ways to thank someone over email. Any one of the following will do:

“Thank you.”

“Thank you very much.”

“Thanks.”

“Gracias.”

“You, Mike Eltringham, are the most awesome guy ever and not enough people recognize that.” (My personal favorite.)

“I severely thank you.” (No one uses this yet but I think it may catch on in the next 5-10 years.)

If you hear any of those, you’ll feel legitimately thanked. But there’s one version of “thank you,” however that tends to leave me wanting. And that’s:

“Thx.”

You ever gotten this one? You email someone to tell them, “Hey man it was a struggle, but I finally got that body buried for you,” and they shoot back the only reply they  have time for: “Thx.”

Just when you thought typing, ‘K’ instead of ‘Okay,’ was the most obnoxious shorthand, along comes ‘Thx.’

It’s the most disingenuous way to thank someone. It’s “let me put the least amount of effort into this thank you as humanly possible.” Next up people will be sending ‘Th.’ After that, just a single T. Pretty soon after that, it will be considered okay to thank someone by simply hitting ‘Reply,’ not typing anything, and hitting send. Because the important thing is not thanking the thankee, but not inconveniencing the thanker.

How obsessed with time management are you that you need to cut a six letter word down to three? That lifehack can’t be worth it. What are you saving the .03 seconds for? “Sorry, along with thanking you via email I also have a massive stamp collection to attend to. I need to dedicate every millisecond I have to philately.”

If you’ve never seen it before, you may not even realize that thx = thanks. There’s no ‘n’ in there. If we’re going off the abbreviation alone out of context, thx to me would sound like “thux.” Thux isn’t something you say out of gratitude, it’s what you say when you’r trying to say thanks but have rocks in your mouth. “Thx? I mean I guess he’s saying thank you but why’s he chewing on rocks?”

My new stock response to ‘thx’ is to reply with ‘Ur welc.’ Then if they follow up with another request for help, I’ll say, “Trapped under rk w/inability to type out exactly how dire my surrondings r. Send hlp nw” and see how long it takes them to send somebody.

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